ryaynross:

im laughing so much a group of really loud boys sat down next to us in mcdonalds and one of them just picked up his burger and said to his friends “i bet i can put this whole thing in my mouth” and my mom turned to me and said “well we know who the gay one is” and they heard her and none of them have said a word since

niggasandcomputers:

This blog is 97% mobile and I want every one to know that

wildhearty:

to be honest my actual biggest fear is to end up like spongebob and always fail the driving test

urbancatfitters:

if u dont know how to respond to something just say “how dare you”

(Source: urbancatfitters)

If My Dog Could Talk
  • Dog:WAT DOING
  • Me:Nothing. I just stood up.
  • Dog:WHERE GO
  • Me:I'm literally walking 3 feet away. I'm not even leaving the room.
  • Dog:CAN I COME
  • Me:I mean sure but I'm literally just-
  • Dog:I COME TOO
  • Dog:WAT DOING
  • Me:I need to open this door.
  • Dog:I HALP
  • Me:No but you're in front of the door. Move please.
  • Dog:I HALP
  • Me:Sigh.
  • Dog:WHERE GOING
  • Me:I am going right back to the exact place I was sitting a second ago.
  • Dog:CAN I COME
  • Me:Sure.
  • Dog:I SIT IN LAP
  • Me:No please don't you are-
  • Dog:I SIT IN LAP
  • Me:No there's no room and-
  • Dog:LAP
  • Me:No, sit on the floor and I'll pet you.
  • Dog:RIGHT HERE
  • Me:That's literally on top of my leg.
  • Dog:IT'S PERFECT PET ME
  • Me:I am petting you. One second, let me just grab my glass-
  • Dog:PET ME PET ME PET ME PET ME
  • Me:I literally am petting you, I just needed a drink-
  • Dog:PET ME PET ME PET ME PET ME
  • Me:I AM
  • Dog:I SIT IN LAP
  • Dog:PET ME PET ME PET ME
  • Dog:HOLD SLOBBER TOY
  • Dog:SNEEZE IN UR FACE
  • Me:.......

flatsound:

i wanna feel how dogs feel when you let them go in a big field 

thunderwear:

im gonna go stand outside so if anyone asks im outstanding


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